he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
His penis makes me feel like a mystic dragon sliding down a turbo slide covered in white gumdrops and sour cashews
Same.
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
It was like giving head to a cactus.
She just took a mirror selfie at the hospital while in labor.
I have to remind myself to breathe. That hungover.
I accidentally sent my dad a very explicit Star Wars fanfiction and he replied with "That was great!"
Election Day 2016 shall forever live in infamy as the day when I hobbled through my neighborhood, mascara melting down my face, wearing one slipper and a cast, blood and cum all over my skirt, carrying a box of wine, and no one even noticed.
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
Randomize
