"it" just moved
tell ils to like buy her flowers and like a balloon that says, sorry I tried to fuck your sister. I think hallmark makes some of those cards too.
she called me screaming that i shouldn't ignore her phone calls, because she's not trying to get me to hang out with her and she doesn't want to be my girlfriend, she just wants sex.
what did you do?
i asked her out. that's so hot.
I really wish I didn't have to wear pants this is ridiculous
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
Mom said you looked used
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
My sober self will be embarrassed tomorrow. For now I am laughing my ass off.
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
i got kicked out of the casino for drunken disorderly conduct because i kept stumbling into old people and one of them told on me. as the boucer was taking down my information so i could no re-enter i ripped my id out of his hands while yelling fuck you.
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
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