Please tell me you did not just serenade her with "Let's Get it On"?
Yeah I think it worked. My penis thanks you, Captain Morgan.
Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
He was singing R-E-S-P-E-C-T to a stripper between motorboats while our HR manager cheered him on.
Next time you decide to go downstairs hungover, please warn me. I now have to explain to twenty eight year olds why you were naked.
Holy shit dude........stairs
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
Randomize
