yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
In Vegas, have spent the last 48 hours wearing a viking helmet and fanny pack. I consider this to be a career high since drinking is my career
I just puked in the mop bucket at work. I think I need to go home.
i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
Turned on my GPS and all that it said in the search bar was "beer,"
I just woke up in bed, rolled over, and found a whole pizza.
this is the second day in a row.
Oh. Yeah. It's the same pizza then.
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
So I come home yesterday and my brother is like "watch this" and it turns out he's been retraining my dog to come running when u say "anal"
I sleep texted my mom and asked her for a condom last night
He was standing in the living room wearing a Donald Trump wig and looking very disappointed
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
He's so drunk that he's ignoring me and just doing what my cat does.
Oh god he's trying to eat cat food... I don't know if I should stop him or continue laughing....
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