im in an endless cycle of being too hung over to eat all day...then getting too drunk because i didnt eat anything. where is my life going?
You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
Found a fruit roll up in my pocket this morning. This means my daughter has a peach blunt wrap in her lunchbox.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Went to a wedding reception last night, came home with a Christmas tree and the rest of the keg
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my roommate woke me up with head. more awkward than it sounds.
I puked in the back of my mom's new car because I had too much to drink at Chilis. I think I just hit rock bottom.
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
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