Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
you know you were way too high when you wake up next to a handwritten list of all the things you'd do for a Klondike bar
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
So I'm not dead, but close call. I think I can handle one more bar.
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
I feel like a bottle of fireball rented a bull dozer and ran me over until I was left without a shred of my dignity
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
He got up after sex and said "is it wrong if I say happy Mother's Day?"
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
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