I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
So I just went home and made my own spanx by cutting the legs off of a pair of nylons. I'm either a genius or missed my calling to live in a trailer park.
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
It's a beautiful day for a hangover
You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
Sorry for calling you a whore in front of your mom. World cup brings the worst out of me.
And then you'll find yourself a hot chick and leave me behind with nothing but my back fat to keep me company.
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
I love you, but it's "shark week" I'll make it up to you with naked breakfast.
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
I'm too high and old for this...
I woke up to a gigantic ft-long tootsie roll and a note by drunk me with the words "you're welcome"
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
Randomize
