Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
Your favorite bartender is back from prision
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
We're both clumsy. What does this imply for our kids?
Helmets.
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
You were in the back of the cop car and told the cop to ask me if I got laid. Youre a dedicated wingman.
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
Randomize
