No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
Lesson 1: you can't keep macking on a girl if you get handcuffed
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
When i say that im working late and also have a paper to write before 9am tomorrow all i want u to respond is saying that ur gunna come over and sexually distract me from my responsibilities. Not a fucking frowny face.
Sorry. Im on my way.
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
Well as if this year didn't suck enough already, I can now count 2015 as the year I got chlamydia
Nothing says "Happy New Year" like having to shit into a plastic bag.
I once broke a mans heart just to get laid by a premature ejaculator
Randomize
