hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
Woke up today to the sound of church bells. My first thought was shit the apocalypse, but then I remembered my hook up lives next to a church. This might be a rough day.
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
Figured out why that fly won't leave. It keeps buzzing through my weed smoke
Fly high, Fly.
He made a deal with his real estate agent called fucking in 50 properties for sale
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
if I hear Wonderful Christmastime one more time I'm putting my foot up Paul McCartney's ass.
Randomize