It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
Ways to know you did something wrong: you sugar-coated it for your therapist.
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
you kept telling everyone how your ninja turtle shell also functioned as a backpack
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
some people spend their whole lives trying to find their soulmate. who knew mine was hiding in utah successfully balancing a pageant career and a coke habit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He pointed at me, then leaned in and said "shes the best at blow jobs" then chris fist pumped him and said "dude, I know"
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
Bud... Did you mean to tweet a picture of your dick? If not just letting you know.
She said she was hoping I'd be hotter. I told her I didn't see anybody standing in line to titty fuck her either. She was a great kisser.
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
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