your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
I drank 13 shots. Which is unlucky. Which is why i threw up.
you threw up because you drank 13 SHOTS
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
He called his prostate his "boner button".
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
My new hobby is moving his stuff to random places in the house. Good luck making a smoothing at 6:30 in the morning, the blender top's in the dog food container
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
I just had to explain why I ate a whole quart of mac and cheese before 8am. Not a good start to the day
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
Randomize
