I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
apparently the 911 operator took drunk dialing waaayy too seriously
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
it was like having sex with a tree stump
i'm sitting in the second floor bathroom drinking coronas in the shower. do not find me.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
Did you leave a mouse under my pillow again?
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
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