I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
Multiple bruises and a hell of a headache later, I have still to find out where the fuck I picked up the bottom half of a mannequin.
Hey, what did you end up doing with those ski goggles?
Anything is possible. I didn't even know I was wearing the toilet cover as a hat
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
Kids parked next to me are getting it on. I'm eating chicken nuggets listening to Kanye alone. Happy Valentine's Day.
I just googled, "what type of cured meat does my face taste like", and one of the top results was, "The Definitive Guide to Bacon." I couldn't make this up if I tried.
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
He told me that he had never gotten a blow job. I sat there for a second, then thought "I MUST FIX THIS!" It was fucking fantastic.
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
Right before he dumped me... he got a really ugly pair of pants. They were twill pants. A pinkish color. When I'm sad... I picture him in them. It makes me smile.
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
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