I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
My superpower would be to be able to make a chick instantly start her period just by thinking about it
i have this theory that all the people in the world who dont like mayonnaise had very bad encounter with jizz once
You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
"Bring the kids" is the most terrifying 3 words I've ever heard in my life.
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
I wonder if a fish could survive in vodka
I could
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
She called a 10 year old handsome and we gave her a look that was equal parts confused and “what the hell is wrong with you”
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