i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
I was too high to figure out which of the three doors would lead me to my classroom, so i sat down in the middle of the hallway and ate a twinkie.
brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
At the wedding. Seated next to the bar. No way this ends well
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
With a stable of 7 fuck buddies, I literally use a random number generator to determine the order in which I will booty call them on my way home from work. I have not slept in my own bed in a month. I just keep half my clothes hanging in my car or in a suitcase.
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
Randomize
