He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
And I was slip and sliding my life away on a giant tarp with tons of soap and bitches. Priorities man, priorities.
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
My trash can accurately represents my weekend: Bojangles wrappers and magnums.
OH MY GOD MY UBER DRIVER IS PEEING BEHIND A DUMPSTER
Still got in the car though
i literally have the attention span of a weasel on steroids, but yeah, i know who you’re talking about.
In a few weeks I'll be a beautiful butterfly and me and my cat will have to repopulate the earth. WE WILL REBUILD!!
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
Randomize
