I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
I just realized I've stolen a hat from every guy I fucked. Except the last one. Maybe there is hope for me.
God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
Last night I had sex with one of the groomsmen I was in the wedding with. In a stairwell. 13 years my senior. Thinking I should retire from the bridesmaid gig.
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
He broke into my house just to tell me the door was locked.
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
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