You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
I'm driving in the middle of nowhere, and I just saw a stuffed Barney hanging from a noose on a tree. Maybe I should turn around.
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
Dude. She told me she felt bad for not giving me more blojobs. HOW COULD THAT HAVE GONE BETTER?
I found out what happened to my eye. I punched myself in the face.
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
You were walking away to pee and as you were undoing your belt you looked at me and said "the belt is off. the game is on. Remever that."
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
Then he texted me that I was the "good kind" of fat.
I woke up in a stranger's bed wearing nothing but santa socks.
Randomize
