I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
I should have some sort of frequent buyer card or something. I just bought my third bottle of Captain this week. It's Wednesday.
I woke up with a piece of pizza duct taped too my hand and a paragraph written on my chest. Good night is say
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
These are your "grown up" slampiece's new hours of operation; please plan accordingly
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
TRY TO UNDERSTAND I HAVE MAGIC POWERS HOLY FUCKING SHIT
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
I'm in the fetal position trying to figure out a way to get someone to deliver me pancakes.
Randomize
