I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
oh don't forget that when we go furniture shopping we have to find a matching bong so put more money in the furniture fund
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
It is a fiery spray of napalm-covered beautiful words that leave a flaming "fuck you" on the ground after I destroy him.
Come back. Shots need mouths.
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
You started yelling about vegans ruining the world. Because we drove past some cows eating grass.
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
Randomize