we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
And we should impose a 'friends don't let friends order 25 shots at last call' rule
I'm drinking and throwing an enormous tennis ball at children. I couldn't be happier.
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
i fucking swear, saying shit like "i dont get jealous" is like personally inviting your slutty friend to fuck the guy you slept with like a month ago
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
If we had kids we couldn't come home, get high and watch porn together. And that's like the only reason I get up in the morning
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
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