Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
I should just throw a hundred dollar bill into the wind and walk away... save myself the hangover.
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
My mom made me write an apology letter to all my family for hijacking the eggnog.
they need to invent a card that reads "thanks for all those boners you gave me that you did NOTHING about"
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
I did stay at work til 5 but for the last hour I was just taking naked pics on my desk for some tinder guy
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
I’m getting back at my ex and training my new boy toy how to properly satisfy a woman. I’m killing two birds with one dick.
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