Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
Who pooed in my magic bullet?
Sorry the bathroom was being used.
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was telling me how the song fireflies makes him feel like he can talk to animals
I had a terrible day! The only thing that makes me feel better is knowing Jack Bauers day was worse.
You're getting a blowjob this afternoon. This has been your morning public service announcement.
Beer coozy in the gym. Don't judge me.
Why do I always miss the parties you're naked at?!
I get naked cuz your not there
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We designated a driver... But it was me..... So we designated another driver
Had a guy spin me around at the bar, kiss me then say "oh shit you're not who I thought you were" and then walk away.
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
the shoes thing blows my mind idk how the fuck i did that and im also missing 4 of my birth control pills like did i drunkenly decide to overload my body with estrogen
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
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