craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
just watched paranormal activity stoned. laughed the whole time and screamed when they turned on the lights. eating doritos. I love my life
You tend to look at life differently when you wake up to nutella vomit all over your room with no recollection of how it got there
You know how to spell recollection?
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
21 Distraught People Found Out They Had An STD
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
just woke up to find an unpeeled banana, with a condom on, halfway into my vagina. this better not be you trying to be funny
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
Hey so I just want to get straight to the point it was me who ate the last cupcake and it was your sister who I fucked last nigt
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
21 Ladies Reveal The Sexiest Thing A Man Can Do In A Public Setting
I am honestly trying to remember his name. All I can remember is that he had a weird mole, a daughter and a lot of cocaine. Please stop letting me pick up at gay night.
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
But he was still all, "YOU TEXTED TONY WHILE YOU WERE GETTING FUCKED?!" Like THAT was the weird part.
At one point, the bartender wrote out the words "please kill me" on some receipt paper and slid it across the bar to me.
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?