you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
If I had a dollar for every time i woke up screaming for my pants i"d have enough money to buy all the beer I stole last night.
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
Doing lines off a plate that says, "things go better with coke."
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
Today's weekday brunch started at 2pm, and consisted of $7 of sandwich and $50 of cocktails. Also, I hustled the bartender for about $3 playing nickel poker, but he may have been letting me win. Either way, he didn't get into my pants.
I'll text you later. I think she thinks we're taking this whole "no sex" thing seriously.
Your life is one shit show away from being a lifetime movie.
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
I just overheard an "I'm going to get your dick so hard" conversation at Costco.
I wore his All-American medal during sex. I came in first that night.
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
Randomize
