She said if it slipped out one more time she was going to duct tape it in her vagina
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
Hes done the math! Hes calculated how much sex it's going to take to fuck 365 miles. Now thats a little brother im proud of. New resolutions are a go!
There's a Taco Bell quesadilla in my shower caddy right now.
Also I'd apologize for texting you flipping my shit about the science of hair growth while I was shrooming last night but we know each other better than that
This friendship isnt goin to work if you dont respond to my drunk texts
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
Randomize
