That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
Sacagawea was the original milf.
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
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I can't find my underwear or one of my shoes but he baked me cookies for breakfast.
He kept falling asleep with the pizza in his hand. I woke him up and told him and he was shocked because he thought he ate it all. Then he would end up falling asleep and we'd repeat the whole process again.
Getting drunk and throwing things at people isnt the same with you not here. Remember when you dislocated my elbow and then popped it back in in one motion?
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know. I wanna do you but I also want a cheeseburger.
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
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