so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
He dated me before I started drinking. I feel like he deserves a consolation bj for all the effort he had to put in to get in my pants.
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
For some reason i am carrying prostate cancer brochures. i am nor used to drinking this early.
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
you left the hospital looking like the grudge, your mom and I were pushing you in a wheel chair and you yelled peace out fuckers.
So I found out me and this guy I was drinking beer with tonight both got lactated on by the same stripper. We're milk brothers.
All three of my roommates have their significant others over. We're all hanging out in the living room. It's like I'm the trifecta of third-wheeling
I haven't been hungover in so long I'm actually looking forward to it
I just stole a bunch of balloons from a birthday party and am giving one to each person at the bar.
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
Randomize
