omg. I had the wrong window open and I accidentaly posted my credit card # on twitter
Whats your twitter name
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
We made a drinking game out of poaching eggs. When did our life turn into a really awesome version of Top Chef?
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
Don't feel bad, we're professionals and we just housed burgers in burger king singing I believe I can fly
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
So here's a tip: don't give a blowjob the same morning you're going to the dentist. Cuz they will think you have "mouth trauma."
Last time I "ran into him" I ended up with the clap and had to explain why the ladder was missing from the garage.
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
He's a wizard, there is no other explanation for how hard I came last night. None.
Randomize
