So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
I need to figure out what I wanna do with my life.
There are margaritas in the freezer still.
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
Threesome in a minivan. New low
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
You don't understand. If you watched a video of the shenanigans that occurred in my life over the past 48 hours you would gasp worse than the girl who witnessed me puking in my bag at the children's hospital
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
he told me "apparently my gag reflex doesn't work so if you magically grew a penis I would deep throat you"
Props to the guy blatantly doing coke in the bathroom at the bar. Walked out of the stall with a credit card in hand, sniffing loudly and shouting "choo choo"
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
But seriously like how many girls do you know that will do that on the first date?
One?
ONE! And it was was glorious!
Randomize
