i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
I had 4 margarita's and 2 mixed drinks and i blew zero's. Its a cinco de mayo miracle.
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
I traded my shirt for vodka. I wonder if my parents can pinpoint where they went wrong raising me.
Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
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