i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
I learned something last night. Strippers can be on house arrest?
So they found him after the wedding still dressed up in his feather boa and top hat passed out in a bush...
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
Just don't have sex while watching Home Alone. It will ruin Christmas for you.
I really wanted you to make me eggs this afternoon. I even wrote it on my hand to remind myself.
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
Randomize
