He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
Acid is not a monday night drug
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
I woke up with spaghetti in my mouth
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
I want him to come over and snuggle with me but put a bag over his head. Is that rude?
It's not rude if you use a pillowcase that's softer.
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
Randomize
