I got into an eating contest with Christina. I ate 6 oranges.
Why? Who won?
we don't know. we ran out of oranges.
she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
I had sex with billy mayes last night. HE KEPT IN CHARACTER THE WHOLE TIME.
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
Is it bad that John just came to my work to have sex with me bc I felt bad that he slept on his porch last night locked out and I missed all his calls?
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
I had so much drainage I couldn't moan properly. Fuck allergy season
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
He spent like 5 minutes figuring out how best to position me so I would still be able to watch the game. Maybe there is a benefit to dating a guy who cares about me but doesn't care about my team.
Pretty sure this is the part where you go buy a ring.
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it
Randomize
