have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
Today I realized that I've had whole drunk relationships with people. And sober me has and wants no part in it.
Heard at work: Get out of my face before I cuntpunch you so hard your granddaughters have miscarriages. I love my job.
I'm moving there. Get me hired.
So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Flying into Chicago for a few days, getting re-deployed in September, we should probably fuck
Kristina got the same text from you just now, she's sitting next to me, how many people did you send this to?
you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
I looked at her and said "I now pronounce you pumpkin tits"
Memorial weekend is going to be amazeballs. Jungle juice, drunk guys, and my vagina being stimulated by the vibrations of a 4 wheeler. I mean there is no way that can go wrong.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
Promise me you will not let me do anything sexual with or to a mini horse no matter how drunk we get. Ever.
Good news, finally found someone who remembers Saturday night. Bad news, everyone in the bar saw your penis
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
Randomize