I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
Uh i was pretty wasted sat, so if i was weird it wasnt me. It was just vodka bein weird w my phone
Tonite tequila might call you
Be prepared
Just paid for that girls abortion on my dad's black card. I feel like P-Diddy.
Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.
Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
Yes I went home with her last night. I woke up this morning and ran into my boss on the way to the bathroom. Monday is going to suck at work.
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
Randomize
