jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
Today's forecast is horny with strong chance of booty calls. Low of Craigslist cruising, and a high of climaxing in a stranger's bed.
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
she definitely didn't appreciate it when you justified bringing her home by yelling to me "fat bitches need love too"
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
I like to listen to classical music when I eat taco bell. I think it cancels out the aura of poverty and desperation.
Quick question, did I crash teeth with you when I snogged you, or did I headbutt something between the car and the bed last night?
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
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