so im in the parking lot of taco bell eating a taco...and some girl just got out of a car and screamed at the top of her lungs "XANEX FOR SALE!!!!" i fucking love Hamilton.
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
Just opened a bottle with my rape whistle. At least it's finally getting used for something.
I told the girl in his bed not to bleed on his sheets like the last one.
We realized he wasn't with us anymore, so we turn around and he's 20 feet back, peeing on a squirrel.
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
Randomize
