Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
I just woke up to crumpled tissues everywhere. Looks like it was another night filled with tears and semen.
Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
Just had sex with your cousin. That's what you get for throwing away a perfectly good microwave. Hopefully you learned from this experience.
That dick who always called me a slut in high school showed up at the clinic with boner problems. Then I was assigned as his nurse. Who's laughing now. I AM.
There is no way I am paying you $5 apiece for pot brownies you found behind a dumpster. $2, maybe.
She had cheddar bay biscuits in her purse. Biscuits, Id and cash. I'm gonna marry her.
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
I spent the entire party sexting people's significant others for them because they were too drunk to do it themselves. I did quite well too. I should start a business
Grandma's bordering on serious shit show territory at this point.
He can't say no, it's my spiritual goddamn quest.
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
God knew I'd have horrible taste in men, so made me asexual to ensure I'd never fuck them.
Randomize
