Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
If I had KNOWN you and mom were coming to visit, I wouldn't have passed out in the frat. This is why I hate surprises.
It was worse than that time I did shots of BBQ sauce and pierced my own ear with a thumbtack
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
The best part about passing out on the floor was the fact that when I pissed myself, I didn't piss the bed again.
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
You can't break up with me. I brought you to see Beyoncé.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
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