Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
If burritos were dicks, we'd have a serious relationship problem on our hands. Just saying.
i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
He told me he was in a Proactive commercial. It didn't seem to work for him but he was buying me shots so I slept with him anyways.
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
Randomize
