Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
i'm drinking with a bunch of phds, i feel very stupid but good about my drinking abilities
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
Just paid my credit card bill at the bar. This phone makes it so I never have to leave
But life is now good. Well, not good, good would be not wearing the penis hat with the extended family of the boy I just cheated on, but as good as it's going to get today
Dear female. Happy valentines day. If you have not had the pleasure of making love to me, please do not fret, I will get around to it soon enough. If you indeed have made love to me, then bravo, wasn't that grand! Perhaps we should do it again? Regardless, have a good day. This has been a public service announcement. Rock on.
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
A dozen fresh-baked cookies delivered to my dorm AND I don't have chlamydia or gonorrhea... Could this night get any better??
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
Randomize
