did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
The couple that wants to take me home just paid the bartender $100 to pour tequila down my throat. I think I'm in some type of twilight zone where stds run rampant and the alcohol floweth
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
I have officially tracked lube all over our house on the bottom of my socks without knowing it. Don't slip when you come in
I went in to wake you up this morning and you had a condom draped across your throat like a necklace. There were no boys in the house last night, what were you doing?
You know you were way drunk when you wake up at 7 AM halfway on a couch, tangled in a sheet with your shoes still on.
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
A guy I don't even know just ate me out on a washing machine at a random persons afterparty. I came as it was going through spin cycle.Just kept thinking "who does laundry during a party?"
Randomize
