Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
remember when you told me, jokingly, to not get jizz on your shirt that i borrowed last night?
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
I have a pocket in my purse that is just for condoms and cocktail swords. I feel like that speaks volumes about me as a person
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
The owner was showing me around and pointed at one of the bars and said "this is the one you're allowed to dance on. I could tell you wanted to ask." DREAM JOB.
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
I mean, the night I fell out of that bus I made you pour vodka onto my wound to clean it, then duct taped a paper towel to my hand and kept drinking.
It's amazing the amount I can accomplish with a glass of wine in my hand.
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
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