i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
lets start a swedish sibling band together
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
If you bring chipotle to my house i'll let you eat your burrito out of my vagina
your like the ambassador to my penis.
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
Well, when he's back from China he's probably gonna be pissed I used the spare key he gave me to prove to everyone I'm fucking an NBA player. We took all his booze too.
Forgot to tell you--the bartender at Crowbar set his arm on fire last night. He was doing this "Cocktail" bartender trick of pouring alcohol that was on fire between glasses. Then some leaked out, onto his arm, and set his arm on fire, then his shirt. Exciting! (And he's ok).
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
I might as well just sew it shut at this point.
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
I think you threw up on me last night but i can't remember so i'm not mad at you.
if having to see my ex’s dick once in a while is the price I pay to the universe for making my life go a little smoother, I’ll take it
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
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