my soul wont recognize me after tonight
I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
I got spanked with a cardboard tube. Apparently he used to be a percussionist. Who favored marching band tunes. It was weird.
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
I'm laying in the fetal position on the floor of my kitchen eating potato salad with my fingers. Please come over with some real food and keep me company.
im at work. we just had a random 14-year-old amish girl come in and gift us with cinnamon rolls as thanks for letting her use the bathroom. i dont even know.
The problem is drunk me is completely unaware how poor I am
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
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