Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
I look better un-naked...
I just made this asian woman on the boardwalk that was giving 20 dollar massages upset after I asked her if a happy ending comes with it.
dont like to call her my roomate, too cordial. i refer to her as the whore that was assigned to live with me
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
I know I said I was done dating 22 year olds but it's not my fault all the guys my age gave up on life and got fat
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck.
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
I'm already too high to be publicly presentable. I just looked at myself in the mirror without my sunglasses. Debated contacts. Said aloud "But I'm nothing without my sunglasses."
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
i wish i could say that was the first 40 year old woman from the circus I nailed
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