He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
So many lesbians keep hitting on me. I'm about to give up and just go home with the manliest one.
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
So my OCD kicked in and I cleaned his kitchen. His roommates were so grateful, they tried to pay me in weed.
YOU ACCEPTED, RIGHT?
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
Dude...are you really going to start sexting during our friend's memorial service?
Sorry for trying to wake you up by slapping your ass with a fruit 2 go.
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
Randomize
