batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
don't ever try to run hungover. just puked mid-run in front of an old couple that were going for a walk. they were horrified.
im sleeping in a hamic at a mansion. best hangover ever
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
Time to do stuff I know I'll have to hide from my grandkids one day and everyone at next weekends wedding.
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
I give all credit to my lucky thong, there's never a time I haven't gotten laid while wearing it
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