you guys were way drunker than both of me
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
Getting pregnant off pre-cum is like getting high off erasers
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
Close your eyes and stop texting and think about puppies. You'll be fine.
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
I cut him off because he was changing my thermostat every time he came over
You made the right decision
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
Randomize
